Alright ladies, listen. We’re onto you. That’s not meant to sound confrontational, we mean it in as friendly a way as possible. Look. We’ve seen those viral images of ugly women using extreme makeup techniques to transform themselves into something conventionally attractive. And there’s something else, we think about women’s bodies a lot- that includes your faces believe it of not.
We know what you’re doing.
WHY AM I SAYING THIS?
Contouring. That’s why. Makeup- otherwise known as ‘farding,’ is about illusion. We accept that. But contouring is too much and it’s gone on way too long. For a while it was okay. But, it’s not like we couldn’t tell that you don’t really look like that. We can, and we’re tired of getting the impression that you think we couldn’t pass the second line of an eye exam.
It might not have come to this point if you weren’t trying to fool us with fake everything. Fake breasts, fake butts, fake hair… not fake faces- no faker faces. Enough is enough, and this contouring fad has gone on for way too long.
IT’S THE LINES
You know what it is. You look like a black light poster from the 1980s. No, you look like David Bowie in early 70s, around the time TVC-15 was released.
We’re not asking you to give up your makeup. The problem isn’t that you use makeup, it’s that you’re so sure that we can’t tell or don’t care that you think you can get away with anything. Well, we can tell, we do care- and you look crazy. And if there’s one thing a guy can’t stand, it’s a woman who’s crazy.
Makeup was about illusion 1500 years ago, when aristocrats wanted to look more ruddy. Today, it’s fashion. So wear it appropriately, and stop taking your makeup tips from Ace Frehley.
THIS WEEK’S TOP PICKS
Shop the bubble pop store to pick up some NEW essentials.
Today is a NEW day!! Unblemished Love, FLawless Rebel Pick Me Up Cream, and Remedy are all available at the Bubble Pop store NOW!!! Click the link in the bio to shop the store. Oh, and apply before you contour!
Take pics of your bubble pop products while you’re applying your makeup and hashtag it #BubblePopBeauty